I’m angry in fact I’m just furious with everybody at the moment people telling me to do this or that whilst others just try to put me down. This post certainly isn’t a pity post because tonight after being sick for the past four days and losing a shed load of weight enough is enough. I NEED to start my journey to recovery not just ‘pussy-foot’ around it. Cut the BS to put it bluntly and do it, I said I’d join Toastmasters to conquer my fear of public speaking and I never did. I feel fired up and ready the desire is there and if I embarrass myself on the way then so be it because nothings going to change by avoiding situations. I’ve said to myself I want to change so many times but its just words no actions, I don’t know where to start but I need something. Toastmasters is three times a month and I’m pretty sure I missed the first one and I’ll be away for the second one so thats another excuse. I have to attend I have to and I will. As soon as I recover I will put 100% into this journey and make a strong effort to enhance my career and fight for what I want. I’ll stop letting people take advantage of my mental state and show compassion and love to those who both need and deserve it. But first I need to climb an enormous mountain I can’t back down or I risk being stagnant and unhappy for the rest of my life. I’m scared and I have been for ages but I want to fight back.
I will be posting daily updates on what I am doing for self-improvement and I hope you can support me on this much needed journey. Goodnight.